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woman apple picking

All By Myself (and I love it!)

Saturday, I had the pleasure of enjoying my annual fall ritual – apple picking.

I usually go apple picking by myself.  I find it meditative.  I pull my red wagon through the rows of trees, selecting the apples that stand out to me.  There’s nothing like chomping on a crisp, juicy apple while soaking up the sun and breathing in the sweet aroma of the orchard.

This year, I invited a friend to join me.

I remembered last year I had mentioned apple picking and she expressed a desire to join me next time.

“I’ve always wanted to go apple picking, but my ex wouldn’t go with me,” she explained.

Hmmm.  That statement gave me pause. 

If I waited for someone else before doing all the things I want to do, I would be waiting a long time. 

I have learned to love my own company.  If there is a movie out that nobody I know is interested in, I will go by myself.  If there is a new restaurant I want to try, I will get a table for one or sit at the bar. 

If you have never ventured out on your own, I encourage you to give it a try.  Something happens when you are responsible for all the decisions.  When you can’t hide behind the needs and whims of others, you learn to step up for yourself. 

Being alone creates space for my true self to rise to the surface.  My desires come forward and I can immediately act upon them. 

If I don’t like the table in the corner, I can ask for the table by the window instead.  I don’t need to seek consensus with someone else. 

If I want to go apple picking, I get in the car and go.  I can take as much time as I want.  I can eat as many apples as I like. 

Being in my own company is great training for honing my voice.  It helps me tap into who I am, what I want, and how I want to be.  Once I know my own mind, I am able to express myself without interference or negotiation.

Next time you find yourself waiting on someone else, try doing it yourself.  The more you learn to love your own company, the stronger and more confident you become.

How can I practice “being in my own company” instead of waiting for someone else to take the lead?

For more tips and tricks to Create Healthy Boundaries and Say NO With Confidence, download my free People Pleaser's Toolkit and begin practicing today.  

If you have questions about how Thoughtfully Selfish Coaching works, visit or if you are ready to talk 1:1 click here to schedule a 30-minute discovery chat with me.