Schedule a Discovery Chat
Back to Blog

Do What You Have To Do - For YOU

“You have to govern yourself.”

I read this comment on one of my friend’s Facebook posts in response to a criticism of their state governor’s decision to open hair salons, barber shops, tattoo parlors and gyms.

“You have to govern yourself.”

Yes.  Call it self-mastery.  Call it self-discipline.  Call it self-control, self-care, personal responsibility, restraint, will-power, determination, grit, or resolve.

The bottom line is that you must govern yourself.  You can’t rely on anyone else to take care of you as well as you can take care of yourself.

I had lunch with a friend on Saturday.  We went for a walk in a remote industrial park, kept 6 feet apart, ordered take-out from a local restaurant, drove (separately) to an empty soccer field, pulled out our camping chairs and tables, and had lunch together.  Here’s a picture of me and Pam:

I pulled my chair a little closer to take the picture, but I assure you that we kept our distance the entire time.

Pam is a hugger.  She is the social glue in her friend circle.  She loves people and gets her energy from socializing.  Pam is a Realtor who is always on the go.  She’s fun and inclusive, kind and thoughtful.

I am an introvert.  I am happiest in a quiet, cozy corner reading my Kindle.  I work from home and would rather attend intimate gatherings than large parties.  We are complete social opposites.  

Pam is struggling during this quarantine.  I am not.  It’s taking a great deal of self-mastery for Pam to stay at home to bend the curve.  I don’t feel the same amount of pressure.  I can empathize for what Pam and other social butterflies are going through. 

We are all governing ourselves differently during this crisis.  Pam must hold herself back from her natural tendency to socialize.  I must push myself out of my solitude to find creative ways to socialize.  We are opposites finding ways to cope in these unusual circumstances.

I knew Pam would be going stir-crazy so I invited her to meet up for a walk on Saturday.  It was her idea to get take-out, bring camping chairs and have lunch.  Together we created a lovely afternoon, feeding our individual needs while staying compliant with the rules, keeping each other safe and healthy, both mentally and physically. 

You must govern yourself.

When you practice self-mastery, you accept responsibility for yourself and your place in the world at large.  When you take control of your thoughts, emotions and actions, you eliminate fear, uncertainty and anxiety.  You decide what you believe, how you feel, what you need and what you will do.  It creates the freedom to just be YOU.

Whatever your circumstance, do what you need to do for you to stay strong, stay healthy and stay sane. 

This won’t last forever, but it might bring out some creativity in you to explore new opportunities and get out of your comfort zone.